Your baby is finally here! After nine months of waiting, your brand-new bundle of joy is cuddled in your arms. So, what happens next? If you’re curious when your baby will start crawling, talking, and more, see below for the expected developmental milestones week by week.
Your one-week-old might be a little more wrinkly than you expected, but of course you love him all the same. Remember, your baby needs fourteen to seventeen hours of sleep a day, and skin-to-skin time can help with breast-feeding success.
Your four-week-old will be more responsive to the world around him, startling or crying at loud noises. Recognizing familiar faces and smiling will not be far behind—get those cameras ready! Continuous sleep might last through the night, but watch out for a regression.
Your twenty-six-week-old is by now a tummy-time expert, rocking onto his hands and knees—the foundation for crawling! This might be a good moment to start your baby on solid foods if you haven’t already, especially if your baby has shown signs of being able to sit up unsupported.
Week Six Hundred and Seventy-seven
Your six-hundred-seventy-seven-week-old is now going through something your pediatrician calls “puberty.” Don’t be alarmed by new odors, skin blemishes known as “non-baby acne,” or patches of hair in odd places—this is all perfectly normal! Your baby might also show new verbal skills, such as stringing vowels and consonants together to form phrases, like, “This dinner sucks,” or, “I hate you, Dad,” or, “Tyler G. has an iPhone so why can’t I get one life is so unfair I wish I was never born.”
Week Eight Hundred and Thirty-four
It may seem like just yesterday that your baby was learning to toddle around on two legs, but he is now developmentally ready for a new form of locomotion: driving a car! Encourage your baby to drive gently so that he doesn’t have a temper tantrum and bump into the other eight-hundred-thirty-four-week-olds.
Week Nine Hundred and Thirty-eight
According to the American Pediatric Association, your baby will soon develop an appreciation for the post-grunge rock band Modest Mouse. This is perfectly normal, but, if your baby shows a preference for later studio albums (such as “The Golden Casket”) instead of their seminal earlier stuff (for example, “The Lonesome Crowded West”), please call your doctor immediately.
Week One Thousand and Ninety-five
Your baby is now more than a thousand weeks old—celebrate this milestone! But watch out: if you notice your baby’s motor skills taking a nosedive coupled with excess spit-up, it could be another regression, or it could just be that your baby is drunk.
Week One Thousand Five Hundred and Sixty-four
Uh-oh—you might have a crabby baby this week! Be on the lookout for signs of extra fussiness, like your baby sending texts to old crushes saying, “Hey, whatever happened to us?,” or spending hours staring at photos of his college rock band and whispering to himself, “I can’t believe my twenties are over.” Consider cheering your baby up with one of his favorite extra-yummy foods, like puréed asparagus!
Week One Thousand Nine Hundred and Twenty-nine
New sound alert! One day this week your baby will suddenly begin making a grunting noise whenever he stands up or sits down. This “ungh” sound is involuntary and is here to stay.
Week Two Thousand and Eighty-five
Your baby has now entered the “midlife” phase, and he just might develop some unexpected interests this week, such as announcing plans to buy and refurbish a ’72 Chevy Chevelle. You may be tempted to argue with your baby, but remember Janet Lansbury’s “Unruffled” method: don’t say no, but rather give your baby other options, like instead refurbishing the ’69 Chevy Camaro that he bought last year, which is still just sitting in the garage.
Week Three Thousand Three Hundred and Eighty-nine
Your three-thousand-three-hundred-eighty-nine-week-old might not be in the mood to do many of the activities that he used to enjoy, and that’s O.K.—your baby is now retired! And, while your baby may just want to spend all day being gently rocked to sleep in his favorite swing, try to encourage active play like pickleball or babysitting your baby’s baby’s baby.
Week Four Thousand One Hundred and Seventy-three
Your four-thousand-one-hundred-seventy-three-week-old might be a little more wrinkly than you expected, but of course you love him all the same. Remember to shower your baby with love, because that’s really all any baby needs, no matter the age. ♦