NEW YORK (The Borowitz Report)—After information broke that the Manhattan District Attorney was convening a grand jury, Donald J. Trump modified the title of his firm to the Eric Trump Organization.
The former President made the announcement in a press convention at his signature Manhattan constructing, the newly renamed Eric Trump Tower.
“Changing the name of the company is no big deal,” he mentioned. “It’s going to be the same company that it’s always been—with Eric Trump running the show and me just following his orders.”
“It’s only fitting to call this company the Eric Trump Organization, because Eric is responsible for everything it has ever done,” he added. “This is long overdue.”
Asked concerning the grand jury, Trump mentioned, “From what I’ve heard, they’re going to be looking into Eric’s businesses quite strongly. I hope he hasn’t gotten himself into a big mess. He’s been a great boss to work for all these years, and I wish him well.”